Dear Deb,

What is the best way to dump a friend?  I have been wanting to separate from two friends for a long time. This desire was confirmed recently when I had a birthday party and they were the only two guests to attend without bringing a gift or even a card!  And this was just a few weeks after I gave one of them a very lovely birthday gift.  The problem is I work with both of them every day and we socialize in the same circles. What is the best way to cut them both out of my life without being very obvious and hurtful about it?
Sincerely,
ready to move on 

Dear ready to move on,

Unfortunately there is no easy way to dump them ... unless they are reading this now and get the hint (only kidding). The fact that they are often in "your space" further complicates matters. Treat them like work acquaintances, not good friends. Consider just tapering things off. Talk to them less, become increasingly less available for them and don't feel like you have to include them in everything.  Also, don't expect them to be like you or your other friends -- that will only frustrate you further. Here's something else for you to read, click here.

Deb

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