Dear Deb,

I have been with my boyfriend for over 2 years.  And just recently, it came out that he absolutely HATES when people chew with their mouth open.  I never realized that I did, but he made sure to tell me I did and how much it bothers him.  I really think it was a psychological thing ... apparently, when he was younger, his mother ALWAYS  told him that he must chew with his mouth shut.  And lately it's coming between our relationship, as silly as it may sound.  I've tried so hard to chew with my mouth shut
now, and I think I'm doing pretty good!  But sometimes, when we're eating dinner together, he sees me chew one bite with my mouth open and he tells me to stop.  And it's not a joking around stop, he's really getting upset over it!  I feel self conscious eating with him, and I feel like I disgust or annoy him all of a sudden.  Sometimes he leaves the
room because it annoys him too much.  I want to marry my boyfriend eventually.  How am I supposed to look ahead to a future of MUCH eating, when he can't even sit with me? What should I do??? 

 It usually takes a couple of years for people to "settle in" to a relationship to the point where they have little tolerance for "annoying habits". While chewing with your mouth open is not particularly attractive, it's not the end of the world either. Perhaps there is something else bothering him and he is just taking his anger and frustrations out on you when you chew. My advice is to tell him that you REALLY want to break this bad habit and then the next time you sit down to eat together, place a mirror in front of yourself so you can watch yourself chew. It may sound ridiculous, but it's no more ridiculous than him getting so upset about the whole thing ... and I think it will illustrate that point quite nicely. 
-Deb

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